The 2 week wait is over

A little over two weeks ago Jordan and I did our first IUI with our new doctor and the third IUI since we started this.  Let me say that these past two weeks have been some of the hardest times we've ever had to deal with.  Our two week wait was not on our minds because our hearts were breaking for our family.  Our precious little nephew went into the hospital during our first week.  He went through a lot of testing until we were finally given the news that he was not going to make it.  Our family gathered around to be with our precious Cooper, my brother, and sister-in-law.  The second week of our wait was spent grieving.  We lost Cooper just 2 days before he would be three months old.  It is one of the hardest weeks I have ever been through.  On Thursday we had a celebration of Cooper's life...a very long, emotional day.  The next day, Friday, marked two weeks from our IUI.  I woke up with a bad feeling about it.  I took the pregnancy test and set it down to wait.  I watched as only one line showed up and there was no sign of the second line appearing.  I knew in my gut that it was going to be negative, and my gut was right.  I felt defeated.  I prayed that God would just give me the strength to make it through the day.  Fortunately, I had a busy day ahead of me at work and it took my mind right off of it.  As I started to look back at the last two weeks I would think did I do something wrong to make it not work: was my stress level too high, were my emotions too much, did I mess with things at work that I shouldn't have, did I eat food I wasn't supposed to.  I just seemed to blame myself for the fact that it didn't work.  My struggle through this whole process has been with blaming myself instead of trusting that God is in control.  I am asking that you pray along with me that I may be able to keep trusting God and putting all my faith in him.  The doctor is having us go through the same process again so it will be another week before anything new happens.

Here we go

I have felt like I've been sitting on the edge waiting for our appointment today...waiting to find out if the higher dosage worked and if we would be able to try an IUI. We were very hopeful walking into the appointment today. They started looking at my follicles and measuring them. (If you have ever looked at a synogram before you know that it is so hard to really know what you are looking at but I sure did try!) After she was done she told me I had a couple good ones, with one measuring 18.4 (18 or larger is what they look for). I couldn't hide my excitement and Jordan couldn't either. They then had to give me an HCG shot which will allow my body to release the egg. Tomorrow morning we will go back in to have the IUI. We are so very excited about it. The excitement for this IUI is very different. We have more confidence in where my body is in the process. We have more support and prayer from so many friends and family that is immeasurable! So as we go in to tomorrow we ask that you keep us in your prayers and thank you for the support you have continued to give us in such a short time! We are so thankful for all the people God has placed in our lives and this journey he is leading us on. 

Follicles and medicine

Yesterday we made the trip over to Carmel again.  When I woke up in the morning I was feeling very hopeful for what would happen.  I was cramping and feeling bloated which lead me to believe that was a good sign.  Our appointment was in the afternoon so I had all morning to think about it.  When it finally came time to do the ultrasound I was very ready.  The technician was great with explaining what she was doing and pointing out what we were looking at.  She went about measuring my follicles (A pocket of fluid in which the egg resides).  After she was done she showed me what the results were for the measurements of my largest follicles.  I didn't really know what the sizes meant but they sounded good.  She then said to wait in the room and the nurse would come talk to us about the next step.  We waited for a while longer than we thought we would.  When the nurse finally came in she told us that my follicles were not measuring large enough to do an IUI.  It was a big let down.  She then said that we would try a round of Letrozole again but with a higher dosage.  The positive note on not having a regular period and trying another round of Letrozole, I get to start right away with taking the medicine instead of waiting until day 3 of my cycle.  We will be going back to the doctor on the 10th to have another ultrasound and see if the higher dosage worked.  If the follicles measure large enough we will hopefully be doing an IUI the following day.  I'm excited that we are moving so quickly from one thing to the next.  I am still very encouraged and so glad we are meeting with a specialist now.